Please More Spirit

Well, thanks to all who comment the past few days since my hormone rant.  It makes me feel better that I am not alone in this misery.  Not that I would wish it on anyone but at least I’m not completely in left field on this one.  If only this pms/hormonal cycle thing could result in a baby, I swear, it would be worth it and I would NEVER complain again.  Ok, maybe that’s a stretch but it would be nice to have these 30+ years be for a reason!

Unfortunately, my “mood” has not completely passed yet.  It’s not like I’ve been freaking out all day every day or anything.  It’s just that when things are not going just right, I start feeling completely overwhelmed.

So I guess the key to surviving pms, for me anyway, is avoiding any situation where something may go wrong!  Piece of cake right?

Ok, so for real, obviously that is not possible, hence why I have felt great at times the past few days and times I’ve felt like someone with a serious mental instability…in other words, completely nutz.

I saw one or two of you mentioned low progesterone as a possible cause of pms.  However, I seriously think it is the opposite for me.  I get the worst pms about a week before my period is expected.  That is when my progesterone should be the highest.  This is also when I usually take a progesterone supplement.  I know my progesterone is on the high side right now because my boobs are hurting.  When I don’t take progesterone, they rarely ever hurt. 

I have also been taking B-complex the whole month now, so unfortunately that doesn’t seem to help either.  I guess I just need to have a little bit more self-control when it comes to my emotions. 

The thing most affected by my pms is my relationship with M.  He gets so irritated with me when I’m like this.  He feels like I set out to pick fights with him.  I seriously don’t mean to, and I don’t think the things we “fight” about are completely unreasonable. I just think I’m not nearly as easy going about his antics as I am the rest of the month. 

So because I am slightly less tolerant of him during “that time”, then all of sudden it is all my fault.  I think I should be considered a saint for putting up with him so easily the entire rest of the month, not penalized for when I don’t/can’t…sigh!

We actually had a “discussion” about this last night.  I just told him that I would really appreciate it if he could just cut me a break when I’m feeling like this.  99% of the time when I get like that, I just need a hug and a little reassurance that everything’s going to be ok.  However, his method of dealing with me usually involves him getting defensive which leads to him pointing out how b__chy I am acting…you can imagine how well that goes over.

But I know I can’t put all the blame on him.  I also need to do my part at controlling myself during those times.  The biggest thing I know I can do is to SHUT MY MOUTH.  Just.stop.talking.  PMS causes major diarrhea of the mouth for me and I just keep talking and stressing my point, because geez, I know I’m right!!!  I want him to admit I’m right too!  So I will try and just remember that my mood is probably affecting my logic so I need to just pick my battles and let go of the things that aren’t important. 

For him, he decided he wants me to let him knowwhen it’s my emotional time of the month so he can do his best to react differently.   I can do that, but there is certainly the part of me that wishes he knew me enough to just be able to tell, but I guess that’s why marriage is not perfect right from the beginning, right?  That’s why it takes couples many years to learn all the emotional intricacies of your spouse.  I guess that sort of improvement is something special to look forward to at least.  I imagine after we’ve been married for 50-60 years, we will know each other like the back of our hand.  Granted, I certainly wont be pms-ing then anymore either…ahh, I can’t wait for that day!

In the meantime, I just need to make it through the next few days!  Beth Moore wrote on her blog a while back about how pms could also stand for “please more spirit.”  Because that is the best way women can handle pms with the love and grace that God would want us to.  Now I just need to start practicing that a little more.  Guess now is the perfect time!