No Sleep = Feeling Cruddy

Do you ever have those nights where you can’t sleep…at all…I mean the whole night!  I know you have.  It’s like no matter what you do, your brain just wont calm down enough for you to doze off?  Well, that’s the kind of night I had last night.  It was awful.

See today was my first clinical shift at the hospital as a nursing student.  As much as I tried to tell myself that the first day would very likely be no big deal (just a bunch of paperwork and such), I was still super stressed out about it. 

My alarm was set to go off at 4:15 am.  So I popped two Advil PM around 10:30 and went to bed.  I think I eventually fell asleep for maybe 5 minutes but then my husband came to bed and woke me up.  I was a gone-er from there on out.  12:00, then 1:00, then 2:00, still awake.  It’s at this point when you start calculating just how little sleep you will have gotten if you fall asleep…”now.”  But then another 30 minutes goes by and you check the clock again and recalculate.  I finally just got up and moved to the couch.  I checked e-mail and twitter and tried to get my mind off clinicals.  I think I eventually fell asleep around 3:00-ish. 

Needless to say, I was a zombie today.  Thankfully God answered my prayers and my clinical instructor (who I love so far), let us go home around 1:00 since it was basically just an orientation day. 

I am going to try and muster up the strength to go to step aerobics at 7:30 tonight and then I will come home, crash and (please God) sleep well all night!  Tomorrow will be a 12 hour day with the patients and I really need to get some good sleep! 

Lisa, I’m sorry I stopped charting!!  But don’t worry, I never planned to stop completely.  I just really really needed a break.  I figured one month off wouldn’t hurt too much.  As much as I want to give my doctor as much information as possible, I also need to keep my sanity too!  I just had too much on my plate.  But I will definitely start right back to charting again this month.  In fact, yesterday was CD1 so I am already back on the wagon!  I don’t think you should be in too much trouble…ha ha!

(oh, and by the way, I still haven’t heard about my blood work results yet)

Ok, I have to work on a paper that is due Thursday.  I hope you are all having a great week!

Blogging Slacker

Hey There!  I know I’ve been a big slacker when it comes to blogging but considering the amount of work I’ve been dealing with, I haven’t really had a choice in the matter.  The last couple weeks have been CRAZY!  But I am nearing the end of the first chunk of my schooling, so I will have a small, brief, respite from it (I think anyway) after Friday!

So after Friday, I will have completed a couple classes and will just have 1 more to complete before the end of the semester.  This class is a lot of work though because we have clinicals (shifts at the hospital) that go along with it.  I will have two 12-hour shifts at the hospital per week.  Then I’ll also have 6 hours of class per week.  The good thing though, is that I will only ever have 1 exam at a time, every few weeks.

The past 8 weeks, the exams, homework assignments, and projects have all been piled on and sometimes overlapping each other.  That makes it way harder to do well.  Your time is always divided.  I’m much better when I only have 1 class to think about at a time.  So I think the second half of this semester will be a lot better than the first half!

The other really awesome thing about these next 8 weeks, are that my clinical group (8 of us) got assigned to the Intensive Coronary Care Unit.  All the other groups are assigned to normal med-surg units.  So basically I am super excited about that!  We are going to be able to see/learn a LOT!  I can’t wait!  This will also give me a glimpse into Critical Care to see if it’s something I want to pursue after college (which I have always thought I might).

On the TTC front, there is pretty much nothing going on.  After I finished my bloodwork for my last cycle, I got all the blood shipped off to Omaha and decided I needed a break from charting.  I wont find out the results for a few more weeks so I figured what’s the point of charting.

I do think we did it at least once during my fertile time, but I don’t know exactly when I ovulated so I’m not sure.  It’s crazy, this is the first time in FOREVER that I don’t know when my period is coming.  I think I may be close to survival week but I really have no clue.  The past few weeks have been a blur so I can’t remember how long ago my fertile time even was…ha ha!  It’s actually been sorta nice!

I will definitely post when I hear some results from the bloodwork.  I will also let you know if I pass by big, huge exam this coming Friday.  It covers everything I’ve learned so far from ALL my classes.  It is basically a prep exam for a portion of the NCLEX.  I have to score above the 60th percentile (in the nation) to pass and continue on.  The nice thing is that I can take it more than once if I don’t pass the first time.  So it sorta takes the pressure off…whew!  The only big negative of not passing the first time is we have to pay something like $100 every time we take one.  So it would kinda stink to have to pay that twice.

Ok, I need to study!  Hope you all are doing well! I’m sorry I haven’t been keeping up with your blogs!  My google reader is on MAJOR overload!

(BTW, sorry for any errors, I don’t really have time to go back and proof-read!)

Random (indicating a complete lack of creativity)

Thanks everyone for your comments on my last post.  Yes, I actually did really enjoy the dream while it lasted.  When I think about the fact that dreams may very well be my only chance to experience that feeling, I try to enjoy them when they come.  It’s just hard getting back to reality once it’s over.  But really, I was fine after.  Just those first few minutes were a tad disorienting, ya know!

I guess it is quite possible that the pregnancy in my dream was due to my new adventure in nursing school.  It is really tough and a TON of work  (way more than I really thought it would be), but I am learning a ton and really enjoying it.  I am starting to get nervous about starting clinicals (the second week in July) but I keep reminding myself how scared I was to start clinicals in my PCT training in January.  It was only scary the first time doing something, after that, you just sort of get into the swing of things!  I am sure this will be the same!

Despite being crazy busy, I am still managing to keep up with my working out and yoga practice.  I can’t believe how much I actually even miss it those couple times when I haven’t been able to do it as much as I wanted to.  Tomorrow will be fun because I have step aerobics in the morning followed by vinyasa yoga right after.  Yay!  I am looking forward to it!

After that, it’s back to work for me.  I have an exam on Monday, Tuesday and Friday plus a big assignment due on Tuesday.   Only a few more weeks until this big initial push is over though.  Once clinicals start, the exams will be much less frequent (Thank you Lord!).

Ok, off to be for me!  I have stayed up late the last few nights so if I don’t get to bed early,  I wont make it up early!

Sorry I have been so bad about commenting lately.  Sadly, you blog friends are not the only friends/family I have been neglecting lately.    I hate that, but it’s only temporary and it is what I have to do to survive at the moment!  I have been keeping up reading for the most part.  I just keep waiting for some exciting news to pop up!  I think we are due for something soon!  I will keep praying for you all!

Slapped in the Face with Reality

So this morning I had the best dream.  It was so incredibly realistic.  I dreamed that I was pregnant. 

I wasn’t showing yet, but it was like I had known about it for a few weeks.  The dream was just M and I hanging out on the couch talking about it.  We were both so giddily happy.  Happiness and contentment was just oozing out of us.  I was in awe that I had our child growing in my belly.  I remember saying to M that even if something bad ended up happening (miscarriage) that at least I knew it was possible for me to get pregnant because up until then, I was starting to think it wasn’t even possible. 

And then I woke up…

Another week looms!

Ah, the beginning of another week looms in front of me!  If I can just make it through this one, I will feel a LOT better!  Of course today is CD 1, but it ’s no big suprise really.  I was expecting it and sure enough, right on time.  I’m like clock-work, it’s almost sickening.  How can I be like clock-work and still be totally infertile.

Anyway, the good news is that I am already feeling light years better than I was a few days ago!  Yay!  I am back!

Also good news, as I was praying at mass today I just got the strongest feeling of peace from God.  I was thinking about school and everything I have to do this week and how crazy busy I have been and I was once again strongly reminded of how good it is that I don’t have a child right now.  As painful as this whole process has been (and still is at times), I am actually really grateful and how it’s all turned out.  I know I’ve mentioned this before but it just hit me again really strongly.  I just realized that if I had a child right now, I would be missing out on so much of his/her life and that would KILL me!  I find it hard to study now when my dog walks up to me and wants to snuggle.  Imagine if that were my own child….?

So I literally thanked God for not giving me what I asked for…am I crazy or what?  That being said, it would be really really great if he could flip the fertility light switch back on for me sometime over the next 6-10 months…ha ha!  But who knows what He has in store for me!

By the way, I’m all done with my blood draws but I haven’t had time to get it shipped to PPVI’s hormone lab yet!  Hopefully I can do it on Wednesday.  Too bad my doctor said it can take over a month to get the results…but no biggie, I am obviously used to waiting by now!

Bombarded…in more ways than one!

First off, I am swamped with school stuff at the moment.  I mean SWAMPED…even more than I was last time I posted.  The problem with only preparing for the NEXT thing (my current plan) is that on that one day when you finish that one thing and you suddenly realize you have FIVE NEXT things due in the next 48 hours (one of which could take the whole 48 hours by itself) you have a major freak-out moment.

As a result, I spent 15 hours studying/doing homework today with a few short (and I mean really short) breaks here and there.  Tomorrow I will be doing the same thing…sigh.  My butt is really hating me at the moment.

Secondly, I am still fighting through survival week.  As much success as I had early in the week, I have definitely seen some ugly-tude the past 2 days.  To top it all off, I had a lovely birth announcement arrive in the mail PLUS a phone call from a long lost friend…yup, you guessed it, pregnant and yes, all in the same day.

I mean, come on!  I have been so…incredibly…good…about pregnancy announcements the past few months…HOWEVER, when they are bombarding me left and right…

in the middle of survival week…

while I’m barely keeping my head afloat with the stress of school…

Well………that’s just mean!

All kidding aside, the good news is that I have been so busy today I haven’t much thought about it.  It was just tough getting to sleep last night, being that the few self-pity tears that snuck out plugged up my damn nose.

Ahhh, this is the life, the life of an infertile, pms-ing nursing student!  It can only get better from here!

Busy Busy and Quick Question

Sorry for the long absence.   I’m still trying to get the hang of this whole school thing.  I’m doing well so far but only because I’ve been studying as much as I have been.  I’ve been learning some cool stuff though!  This week our validation includes passing meds through IV’s!  It’s really fun!  I love the way all the equipment works and I think it’s cool that I know how to do it now. We haven’t learned how to actually start an IV yet (meaning the initial poke in the arm), which is fine  because I’m really nervous to start poking people (because it involves inflicting some amount of pain onto someone)!  I did practice injections already, but only on an orange, not an actual person!  But heck, I’m practically a pro already with the subcutaneous injections after all my infertility stuff.

Onto cycle news, I have a quick question for my fellow NaPro girls:  So I’m doing the full hormone series this month and I’m almost done…yay!  What a pain in the butt this has been.  Talk about adding to my already full schedule!  Well, I am P+10 today.  Yesterday, I was supposed to get my P+9 blood work and I TOTALLY forgot about it, only remembering after the lab was already closed.  Argh!  So of course, today is a holiday and the lab is closed again…sigh!  So I guess I will just go tomorrow (P+11) and Thursday (P+13) to finish it up?

I don’t think this should be a big deal but I was wondering what you girls thought.  I’m really bummed that I forgot about it.  I will be missing a whole data point from my series.  But I guess if the P+7 (the really important one) and the P+11 are normal than we can just assume my P+9 would have been normal too, right?  Then it really shouldn’t be a big deal.  Either way, I can’t stress about it.  It is what it is and there’s nothing I can do about it now.

By the way, being that I’m at P+10, it also means I’m in the dead-nuts middle of survival week.  Amazingly, the only emotional meltdowns I have had have been brief and only directed at myself (i.e. when I lost something that was in front of me 5 seconds before).  No other meltdowns to report…whew!  Although I guess I still have a few more days to make it through before I can declare victory!

So even though I’ve been super busy, I have still managed a few visits to visit my goddaughter, JEM.  Can I just say again that she is the sweetest thing!  Last night we went over there for dinner.  After JEM ate, she fell asleep and I got to hold her.  She snuggled up to me and slept for almost 2 hours while I sat in the rocker.  My friend and I watched the movie Bride Wars and I had her almost the entire movie.  I am in love!  I swear, I could hold her all day long!  Even when she got a little crankier later in the evening, I didn’t mind doing laps with her to keep her calm and happy!  It was so so nice!

Alright, back to studying for me!  I am learning all the functions of the cranial nerves and how to test someone to make sure nothing is going wrong in their brain!  My validation is at 11:30 tomorrow!

I Passed!

I passed my validation!  Yay!  I did forget a couple things but nothing major.  That’s all I could ask for!

Now I have a bunch of homework type stuff to work on and an exam to study for that is on Friday….at least I will be at home pretty much all day tomorrow!  I should be able to get lots done. 

I will probably try and squeeze yoga in too though!  Well, that and my blood draw (it will be CD 13 tomorrow and I think my peak day is going to be any day now).

Ok, I gotta get to bed.  I hope you are all having a wonderful week so far!

A Happy Mother’s Day and Stuff

Well, my first week of school is over but I haven’t been able to catch my breath yet.  I have a LOT to do.  I think I am just especially nervous to do well.  I don’t want to just get by, ya know!  But wanting to do very well also puts a ton more pressure on me!   Ahhh….!

I have a “validation” on Tuesday morning which is basically where I have to perform a series of nursing skills and my professors (also nurses) grade me on how well I do.  I have to memorize the steps and perform them without asking any questions or getting any guidance.  This week we have to do 3 things:  a full assessment of the Head and Neck (including eyes, ears, nose, and throat), take a person’s vital signs, then do a hygiene series including giving a bed pan, giving a bed bath, giving oral care (teeth brushing), and changing the sheets of an occupied bed. 

Now these things aren’t really all that hard, but doing them in the proper order without forgetting anything is tough, especially under pressure.  The worst part is that we have 8 weeks of these and we have 3 skills per week.  If we do not get a 70% or higher on any 2 skills it is considered a fail and, we are KICKED OUT of the program.  Some of these skills have specific tasks that if you miss them, you automatically fail, even if you get everything else 100% right. 

Talk about pressure…sigh!  I guess I will just be praying big time that God helps me remember those important things.  It’s just that some of them are so easy to forget.  For example, when you are helping a patient, you are supposed to raise the bed to a comfortable working height, however when you are done you MUST remember to lower the bed.  It is a huge fall risk otherwise.  So if for some reason I forget to lower the bed when I finish, I will fail…scary. 

Oh a happier note, I got to babysit JEM on Friday for an hour.  She is the sweetest girl ever!  My friend says she never cries.  In fact, she has to wake her to feed her during the night.  So when I babysat, she didn’t cry.  She just made the cutest little squeaks and grunts.  At times it even seemed like she was dreaming…what the heck does a one week old dream about?

As for Mother’s Day, I actually had a really great day today!  M and I went to church Saturday night to avoid the whole Mother’s Day focus we usually get on Sunday morning.  But even today, I really didn’t even have any “I’m not a mother” pains that I have felt in years past.  Maybe it’s because I am crazy busy with school and I am relieved to not have a child to care for or maybe it’s because I have a new goddaughter to fuss over.  But I don’t really care why, I’m just glad I was able to have a wonderful day with my family without even the tiniest ounce of self pity.  It felt really good!  It’s almost like God knew just what I needed to get through nursing school…a goddaughter to help soothe my heart a little without the full time stress of a baby of my own!  I’m glad He’s in charge!

Ok, I have to go practice my skills one last time before I hit the sack.  I need to go recruit my hubby to be my lovely assistant (or patient in this case). 

By the way, I just said a prayer for all of you still longing to be a mother, especially several of my close friends.   I prayed that God would grant you the desires of your heart and that in the meantime He would give you his unending peace until He does!

Cheeks

Look at those cheeks!

Hormone Series – Day 5

Thanks for all your sweet comment on my goddaughter post!  It was such a fun day!  Last Friday I was able to go back and visit them both at the hospital again.  This time I got to hold JEM for a long time….ahhhh!  It was so wonderful.  She is so adorable.  She has the chubbiest little cheeks!  I have to post a new pic I took that day!  (It’s not working, I’ll have to post it later!)

As for me, CD1 was last Friday.  Considering it was May 1, it makes it easy to count cycle days this month at least!  So today is CD5 which means it is the first day of my blood work for my NaPro hormone series.  I headed over to the lab this morning and got my blood draw.  The lab was a bit confused considering I’m only having the blood drawn there.  They have to hold/freeze the blood and at the end of the month, they will ship all the blood at one time to the Hormone Lab at PPVI in Omaha.  When I tried explaining this to the lab tech, she looked at me like I was crazy…LOL! 

In the end, they seemed to understand what needed to happen.  I just have to supply the box/packing supplies to ship the blood at the end of the month.  This may be difficult though.   I need to get some sort of Styrofoam container because the blood needs to be shipped on dry ice.  I’m not exactly sure how I will do that but I guess I will figure it out.

On the school front, yesterday was my first day!  It went very well.   I heard two of my professors lecture and they were both good….whew!  I have a real problem when my professors are bad lecturers.  I hate that that means I have to learn a lot more on my own.  I know that is just how life/school is sometimes and you just have to deal with it, but it is still nice when you actually have someone who’s good at teaching!

Today is our first lab day!  I think it should be a decent day!  I still have a lot of reading and studying to do already though! 

Ok, I have to run!  I have to go meet my lab partner/carpool buddy in a few minutes!  Have a great day everyone.  Sorry I’ve been so bad about reading and commenting on all my regular blogs lately!  I need to get a handle on everything so I can balance my time better!  Once I get in the groove it should be better!

Welcome Little One!

Holding my goddaughter for the first time!

She’s finally here!  What a sweetheart!  She was a whopping 9 lbs 10.5 oz and was 20.5 inches long.  Basically she was HUGE for a newborn!  My poor friend was in labor for 9 hours and then had to have a C-section because little “JEM” was so big! 

Sticking out her tongue at me already!

It was a wonderful day!  I know one day I’ll have my own…but until then, I will soak up all of JEM’s sweetness that I can!

Happy Day Everyone!

It is a Good Day!

Whew!  Today was a tough day and it’s still not over!  I spent several hours cleaning my house this morning (we’re having company on Saturday night) and several hours cleaning out our flower beds this afternoon.  My back is cursing me!    In 30 minutes, I will be heading off to do some power yoga…is that crazy?  Oh well, I’m still doing it.  After I get home, M and I will have dinner and then I’m off to go grocery shopping for tomorrow!   I have a feeling I will be sleeping like a rock tonight!

On the emotional front, I am quite proud of myself!  I am doing so well!  I met up with my former co-workers for lunch today and was surprised when another co-worker I hadn’t seen in awhile also showed up and was obviously 4 or 5 months pregnant.  She just got married last year (I think).  She even passed around ultrasound pictures!  I handled it surprisingly well considering it’s survival week and all!  Honestly, I think I just have so much going on that my not being pregnant is the farthest thing from my mind. 

This is good.  This is really good!

More good news is that my scale has FINALLY started moving again this week!  Yay!  It’s about darn time!  This came at the perfect time because I was really starting to get frustrated.  Finally seeing progress has just amped my motivation once again!   I only have about 4 or 5 pounds to go!

Ok, I gotta run!  Yoga is calling and I hate rushing to get there…it pretty much defeats the purpose of yoga (calming your mind while working your body) when you’re road raging the whole way there…ha ha!

Enjoy the beautiful weekend!  (Well, I hope it’s beautiful where you’re at, because it certainly is going to be a beautiful here!)

Survival Week Begins – Look Out!

Yup, it is definitely the beginning of survival week for me.  But I think being at home and really only doing what I want to do has helped immensely.  I warned M last night though!  I will try and be good but it would help me out if he could just be little extra loving these next few days.  I am also swearing off Facebook for at least the next 3-4 days.  I will read anything in my inbox, but I’m not reading anyone’s status updates! 

On a happier note, I think my goddaughter is going to be born next week.  My friend has an appointment on Wednesday of next week and if little Janie still measures big they will induce her on Thursday!  I can’t wait to finally meet her and get a sweet baby fix!!!!

I also have some other really great news.  When I worked at the pregnancy center on Tuesday, I asked about that girl I counseled last week.  Apparently she has put off having the abortion and actually went and saw a doctor on Monday.   I think that is a REALLY great sign!  It shows she is concerned about the pregnancy.  Obviously she may still change her mind but from the person we talked to who gave us the update, it seemed likely she would either keep the baby or place it for adoption!   Praise God!!!!!  I just got the biggest smile on my face when I heard that!  It just picked up my spirits after being sad about it over the weekend.  God is definitely in control and I’m glad because I definitely could have done a better job last week!  But it didn’t matter because God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness!

One last thing…the other day, M says to me “do you feel different?”  I said, “…uh, no.  What do you mean?”  He basically said that he just had this feeling that I might have conceived this month.  I sorta laughed at him because we actually missed my peak day by 2 days this time.  In fact, I don’t think we did it all during my fertile time.  A lot of things were going on last week and I just didn’t feel into it.  I knew we were missing our time, but since I’m starting school, it’s not really the best time for me to get pregnant anyway (like I even can…LOL), so I didn’t see any sense in trying this month.  I really don’t think there is any chance that I did get pregnant this month, but I just wanted to put this out there, just in case in DID happen (a complete miracle).   (BTW, M has NEVER said this before in our 3+ years of trying).

The List Keeps Growing

Well, I haven’t really had a chance to get into the groove of this whole SAHW thing yet!  Yesterday was crazy busy and today is shaping up to be the same!  The nice thing is that I can SLOWLY get ready in the morning…have coffee, eat some breakfast, watch a little GMA, check e-mail from the comfort of my bed…yay!  I could definitely get used to this.  The bad thing is that I really do feel like I have a ton to do.  I’ve only checked one thing off the list so far and yet I’ve added several things….argh!  

Well, I have to run.  I have to take a shower, then head over to the University to turn in some financial aid forms, then off to the library to read and study for an entrance exam I have the first week of school.  This evening I am volunteering at the pregnancy center.

Speaking of, I have to share a story.  When I worked at the pregnancy center last Thursday we had an 18 year old girl come in who had just found out she was pregnant even though she was about 8 weeks along.  Her dad brought her in so she could talk to someone about her situation and also so she could have an ultrasound.  I spent about 30 minutes talking with her.  She really wanted an abortion and wanted to make sure she wasn’t too far along.   I can’t share anymore details but her situation made it seem very difficult for her to even consider parenting her baby. 

Eventually I passed her along to our nurse to do the ultrasound.  About 5 minutes after she went into the ultrasound room, I heard the heartbeat LOUD and clear through the door!  I immediately got choked up.  What a beautiful sound!!  A sound that I would give ANYTHING to hear for myself!  After she left, the nurse said she was still really leaning towards an abortion.  It really broke my heart.   I wanted to beg her to let me have her baby…but we can’t do that.  Due to legalities, I’m not even allowed to adopt her baby even if that’s what she wanted.  I don’t know what she ended up deciding, but the situation really affected me.  I will be asking tonight if anyone has heard what happened.

Ok, I’ll be back later this week!  Hopefully I’ll have knocked a few more items off my list!

A New Era

Well, that’s it!  I’m actually done!  I got a call from HR on Friday morning and they told me that Friday would be my last day in the office so I needed to pass along any info I had to my co-workers (did that already), pack up my desk (mostly already did that too) and leave.  I have to go back to meet with HR on Monday to sign all the paperwork and turn in my company property, but it’s in a different building so I wont even be going into my old building.  I was surprised.  I figured I’d have Monday to say all my goodbyes but it wasn’t to be.  I admit, as much as I am so excited and ready to leave my old career behind, I was actually pretty sad about leaving all the great people I have worked with.  I even cried when I said goodbye to my co-worker who has been my partner/teammate for 8 years.  It’s “the end of an era” (ala Friends).

So as I was driving home, I called M.  I was still choked up and just wanted to cry.  But then I realized that I would definitely not be crying come Monday morning when I don’t have to wake up early…ha ha!  That helped perk me up a little!  And it’s not like I’m never going to see the people I was actually friends with again!

Ah…but really, I am FREE now!  I will never work as an engineer again and I’m officially a SAHW…well, at least for the next 2 weeks anyway.  Then I’ll be a full time student again…weird!!!

It’s the start of a NEW era!

Protected: The Surrendered Wife

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The Final Days

Well, I’m down to my last 3 days of work!  I found out officially that my last day of work will be this coming Monday, April 20. 

As excited as I am to move on to my new career, it is still a little sad to be leaving my company.  I have worked in the same department, in the same group, for the same manager, and with pretty much all the same people for the last 8 years.  That’s a LONG time especially when you’re spending up to 40 hours per week with someone!   I will definitely not miss the actual work, but I will miss the people.  We have some really wonderful people in my department.  At least I’m not leaving the general area so I will be able to stay in touch with my friends!  The core group in our department organizes happy hour’s regularly so I will still do my best to join them once in a while!

Aside from those small feelings of sadness, I am still really looking forward to having almost 2 whole weeks off before school starts!  I have been continuing doing yoga almost every day (I still love it) and working out/cardio on top of that!  Unfortunately I haven’t lost any more weight…I’m not sure why but I have definitely seen my muscles grow and also dropped my body fat percentage, so that’s pretty cool.  I’m trying to use the mirror as motivation as opposed to just the scale.  The pounds will eventually start dropping again (I hope)…I just wish it would go a tad faster.  But with all my time off coming up, I will have lots more time to keep up my activity level!  I also hope to get lots of stuff done around the house, errands run, scrapbooking started back up, and get-togethers with friends!    I can’t wait!

So I will post more on the SW stuff in a pwp post.  It will be the same password as before for all you who got it last time.  Otherwise feel free to leave me your e-mail address and I will send it to you.

The Theology of the Body CD’sI have been listening to have been really eye opening.  Basically the speaker, Christopher West, explains Pope John Pauls’s teachings from awhile back about what God’s original intent for and meaning of the body really was.  Society (and sin) have really warped our sense of what our bodies are for.  In many ways, society looks at people and their bodies as objects.  The theology of the body gives some practical ways to live out the proper/godly view of the body.  I am only about halfway through but it is really good.  I asked M to listen to it also.  I think it’s a little more overwhelming from a guy’s perspective because they are so much more visual!   It is a hard concept to put into practice.  But at the same time, there was a lot of really great points about women and their struggles in it too.   I would highly recommend it!

As for my NaPro stuff…I decided to hold off for another month before getting my hormone series done.  I made an appointment with my primary care physician last week to see about getting some of it covered by my insurance.  I have an HMO and they usually don’t pay for anything that is out of network.  So I had a long talk with my doctor to see how we could word the referrals so that my HMO might be more willing to accept it.  We had several strategies mapped out but it wasn’t even necessary.  Later that day, her office called me and said that my HMO has a special provision that allows me to see anyone out of network so I’m all set…..huh?…come again?

I guess through my work…the HMO’s they pay for will let you see someone out of network.  Now, I’m not sure they are going to cover 100% of the cost, they may only cover the cost up to how much they would typically pay an in-network provider.  But still….even if they only covered 30-40% of the cost, that would still be a huge help!   Yay!  Next year, we will still switch our insurance to a PPO so that if I do end up getting surgery at PPVI (after I finish school), it will at least be 70% covered!

So as soon as my next cycle starts in about 2 weeks, I will start the series!   Needle sticks…here I come! 

That’s all for now!  More on the SW in my next post!  By the way, I am totally delinquent in sending it the next person.  I should be able to get it in the mail tomorrow or Saturday!

Reading and Reading!

So I’m reading the SW book and it’s really really good!  In fact, I ordered another copy because I just had to give it to my sister to read.  She is actually reading it right now too!  I figure there’s a good chance we will be passing around our copy to some of our other friends! 

I don’t have a lot of time to write tonight since I’m really trying to get the book finished so I can ship it off to the next person but I wanted to share a link to a really cool blog post I came across today!    It was shared by “Infertile.  Who, me?”  It has a really great cartoon that had a very poignant message.  I hope it strikes you like it struck me!

Here it is!

Refreshing Weekend

Whew, last weekend was just what I needed!  I had a lot of fun!  I ended up meeting Soapchick for coffee on Saturday morning!  I just love her!  She is such a wonderful person and so easy to talk to!  She has such good advice and I feel like I could talk to her forever!    ((Thanks Kelly!!!))   I would add a link to her blog but she is private for the time being!

After meeting with Soapchick, I headed to meet another friend to have a healthy lunch, do some bridesmaid dress shopping (she is getting married in October) and then we decided to try a yoga class in order to get so physical exercise in!  (this is one of my new goals…to incorporate fitness or movement into get-togethers!) 

This was my first time doing yoga in a studio.  Previously I had only tried it using a few DVD’s I bought a few years ago.  I really liked one of the DVD’s I have, but I quickly got bored of doing the same thing over and over and I stopped doing it awhile ago.  The yoga class we went to was a combination of Slow Flow and Vinyasa (for fellow yoga-ites).  It is done in a hot room and when I say hot, I mean HOT!  I think they set the temp at 90 degrees. 

I admit, when I first walked into the class, I was like “woah…it’s hot in here.  I feel like I’m on the verge of sweating and I’m not even MOVING yet!”  I thought I would get really uncomfortable but actually, I ended up really liking the heat!   I think it must be because usually I am always FREEZING all the time.  It is nice to actually overly warm for a change!  I sweat a ton in the class which isn’t the most lady-like thing to do, but I felt so good afterwards…I was calm and peaceful and yet I could tell I really worked my body! 

The yoga studio we went to gives you a whole week of unlimited yoga for free to try out different classes so I went again on Sunday and again on Monday!   I took today off…but only because I wanted to go to my step aerobics class and felt like doing both might be a tad overkill…!  But seriously…I think I really like doing this.  I am 99% sure that I am going to sign up for a few months. 

It was amazing how sore I was yesterday during the day from doing it Saturday and Sunday, but once I got to the class, got into the heat and started moving, I didn’t even feel the soreness anymore.    But afterwards, I could still tell my muscles got an amazing workout!  Yay!  Something that’s good for me that I actually ENJOY doing! 

I wont be giving up my cardio and other gym workouts (step, spinning and resistance training) but I think this will be a great addition…especially to help me deal with some of the stress in my life.  Yay!

Sunday, I met another friend for coffee in the morning and then another friend for lunch!  It was quite the social weekend and I loved it!  I forgot how truly important it is to have close women friends.   M is just not able to completely fill that womanly need to talk and share and relate!  I think I wear him out sometimes…LOL!

Anyway, I just felt really recharged and it came at the perfect time!  I think I can officially say that survival week is over for now!  Yay!

Onto cycle news….amazingly I am on P+12 and I’m still not spotting yet.  This is my first cycle with no medications and I’m happy that things haven’t gone wacky yet.  Not that I think I’m healed or anything…but it’s nice to not have the spotting at least!

I wanted to post a picture of my charts for the past few months, but I can’t figure out how to do that.  I have my chart in excel but I don’t know how to make a .jpg of the chart itself when it’s in excel. 

I have more to share about various other things that are going on…but I figure I should save something for future posts since I tend to go through very uninspired/lack of posting phases!

By the way – I have come up with some new survival week self-imposed rules that I will share soon, including things like “No Facebook allowed until is it clear that survival week is over!”

I also want to talk about the new book that Sew started passing around.  Including how even after only being around M for a short time today, I have already screwed up!  This is going to be harder than I thought!

Oh yeah, and I want to talk about the Theology of the Body CD’s I’m listening to right now!

(I just wanted to list them out so I don’t forget!)